GPTs-and-Me

Liminal: (adjective) 1) relating to a transitional or initial stage of a process. 2) Occupying a position at, or on both sides of, a boundary or threshold (Oxford Dictionaries).

Liminal Faith is a concept that I have been developing for years. First, let’s take a moment to explore the meaning of “liminal time.” In 1986, one of my professors, Don Saliers, introduced me to the concept of “liminal time.” Liminal time is the time between times. For example, “the kingdom of God is near, but not here.” This state of being between times is “liminal time.” Pregnancy is another example of liminal time. The baby is near, but not here. I took this idea of liminal time, and I expanded it to include faith, hence the concept of liminal faith. But, what is liminal faith?

We’d like to think that faith is solid. Many suggest that faith must remain stable, secure, and unchanging. Yet, there are life events that teach us otherwise. Tragedy forces us to acknowledge that faith changes through the seasons of life. This blog is dedicated to the faith that exists when we are at the threshold of a changing faith. We are neither in the secure identity of a caterpillar’s faith nor are we in the liberating flight of the butterfly’s faith. We are in the physical and metaphysical struggle of the chrysalis. We wait to be redefined. We hope to be reborn. We push to find our wings. We practice liminal faith.

The thesis of this blog is that faith is transformed when we experience events that crucify our faith. These life-moments force us to face our vulnerabilities and limitations, our inability to change the past and control the present. Our faith is nailed to the cross of crucifixion. This liminal faith is more than a time of facing the cross. This is a time of trial when we are on the cross. In this state of suffering, we are forced to examine our doctrines, our values, our mission — the very essence of our existence. We can not practice secure faith, nor are we able to embody a liberated faith. All that we have is our liminal faith.

A comfortable and convenient belief is that we only have to practice liminal faith once in our lives. The use of the butterfly metaphor implies this hope. Let’s be clear, though. There are numerous life events throughout that force us into cocoons. Practicing liminal faith becomes more familiar with time. This awareness helps us to feel more oriented and better prepared for the next struggle. We come to rely on our spiritual disciplines when practicing liminal faith. Previous experiences of practicing liminal faith do not, however, guarantee that the current struggles will be less intense.

This thesis continues by proposing that there may be multiple shades of the following two primary outcomes of liminal faith: 1) a wounded and stunted faith, or 2) a healed and transformed faith. The hope is, of course, that we will identify the personal core values that we need to fly forward. Our doctrines will become more enlightened (merciful and embodied). And our existence will become more fully human and divine.

To listen is very hard because it asks of us so much interior stability that we no longer need to prove ourselves by speeches, arguments, statements, or declarations. True listeners no longer have an inner need to make their presence known. They are free to receive, welcome, and accept. – Henri Nouwen

I’ve wasted a lifetime of energy trying to force people to understand me. As if I could force understanding. Forcing understanding is like trying to force a child to eat. The child becomes increasingly stubborn, and the meal becomes a battle of wills. So it is with understanding. We can’t force others to understand us. We have to create an appetite for understanding. Shoveling empty and tasteless words will not create this appetite. We create an appetite for understanding by creating a welcoming space. We do this by listening. We earn the right to speak by listening.

We live in a world filled with monologues and diatribes. It feels like everyone is talking, and no one is listening. The above Henri Nouwen quote suggests we lack the “interior stability” needed to listen. I think there is some truth to that. Look at the recent election as an example. The only thing commentators agreed on was that both parties were unstable and on the brink of self-destruction. Could both parties lack the “interior stability” to listen to and understand the other party? Better yet, let’s make this more personal. Could we lack the interior stability to listen to each other? Are we trying to force our messages on each other?

Here’s my New Year’s prayer. I pray that we will do the interior work needed to be secure and thus secure enough to listen to each other. I pray that the need to be understood will wither while the need to understand grows. I pray that we will stop fighting and start healing. I pray that we will be united rather than divided. I pray that we will listen. I pray for acceptance. Shalom.

But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart (Luke 2:19, NIV).

You think Mary had it easy? Dealing with a teen pregnancy … giving birth in a barn … and dealing with the promise that her baby boy would be the promised Messiah. We tend to glorify Mary’s story and remove the details of her humanity. But, her story is full of real life details. It’s a story that suggests that she had to practice liminal faith through this time of knowing and not knowing. She surely had to have a faith that was suspended between belief and disbelief. She received the message that she was pregnant. That alone can create suspense and disbelief. On top of this news was the promise that her child would be the Messiah. This is hard to believe, I don’t care who you are. And then there were the nine months of waiting for the baby to be born. I’m not a mother (obviously), but I’m guessing that this liminal time is filled with a rhythm between doubts and beliefs. Surely, Mary’s pregnancy was filled with sleepless nights of wondering about her abilities and disabilities. Matters got worse when she was displaced in Bethlehem on her delivery date. How could she know that God was fulfilling the promise. This sure seemed like an odd way to give someone VIP treatment. What kind of God pushes a mother into a barn to deliver her child? The Messiah? None of these birthday details made sense. Personally, I don’t know how anyone could have an unwavering faith under these circumstances. Perhaps Mary did. But, it makes more sense that she had to practice liminal faith. (If you’re wondering about my definition of liminal faith, please read my comments on the right side of this page.)

Luke tells the story of Mary giving birth to Jesus in a barn. He also mentions that shepherds visited Mary with a special message. “An angel told us to come here. We were afraid and didn’t know what to believe. The angel said that we’d find you here and that your baby would be wrapped in cloths, and this would be a sign that the promised Messiah had been delivered. Mary … your baby is the Messiah! We’re here to tell you … your baby IS the Messiah.”

Luke concludes his story with one of my favorite observations recorded in scripture. “Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart ” I’d like to suggest that this one verse offers one of the best strategies for practicing liminal faith.

First, we should treasure every divine revelation that comes our way. It’s hard to have faith when it feels like the cards are stacked against us. It’s hard to count our blessings when we feel that there are more curses than blessings. It’s hard to have faith when we don’t know what to believe. So, when we hear that whisper of God’s voice, then we have to strain to hear. And, we must treasure every confirmation of God’s divine presence that we experience.

Second, we ponder. It’s hard to create a recipe for faith. But, I’m convinced that one of the core ingredients is pondering. How can we experience a wonder-full life if we don’t ponder? Pondering helps us to find meaning and purpose. Pondering helps us to redefine our values and our beliefs. Pondering helps us to solidify our convictions. Pondering builds faith. The opposite is also true. Closing the mind is like closing a coffin on faith. A closed mind will without a doubt cause faith to wither up and die.

If you are practicing liminal faith because you are stuck somewhere between here and there, don’t give up. If you are grieving the death of a loved one, treasure the memories and ponder the good times. If you are facing the heartache of a broken relationship, treasure the support that you receive from others, and ponder who you are and who you will become. If you are recovering from addiction, treasure your sobriety, and ponder about “the next best thing.” And, if you are a new parent feeling overwhelmed with the responsibility of caring for one of God’s children, treasure the innocence of your child, and ponder your baby’s future.

May we all enter the New Year by treasuring God’s promises and pondering God’s grace and mercy. AMEN.

“This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” Luke 2: 12, NIV

Adoration of the shepherds, Gerard van Honthorst, 1590 – 1656

Why does saying Happy Holidays have to be a defiant effort to take Christ out of Christmas? Most people (businesses) standardize their greetings as Happy Holidays because they want to include the other religious celebrations of the season. I don’t think that they are opposed to wishing Christians a “Merry Christmas.” It’s more that they want to include everyone in the holiday business season. That’s smart business!

The word “holiday” is an abbreviated version of “holy day.” To be holy is to be whole, and to be whole is  to be one with God, self, and neighbor. These days in December are considered holy days because this is the time of the year that people of faith celebrate God’s efforts to bring peace on earth. Shalom.

Today (December 24th) marks the first of the holy days that Jesus observed. Jesus celebrated Hanukkah. I ‘ll resist the need to try to explain this eight day festival of lights. Instead, I’ll mention that the word Hanukkah means “dedication” and the holy days celebrate the dedication of the faithful, and God’s dedicated faithfulness to the obedient.

I’m going to shift my focus for a minute. Let’s acknowledge that for many, this season feels lonely and depressing. The holiday celebrations create more of a crisis of faith than a celebration of faith.  This is partially caused by an over-emphasis on secular Christmas rituals, rather than a ritual remembering of God’s faithfulness. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the Christmas stuff as much as anyone. But, let’s face it, there is a lot of Christmas stuff! Christians have to bear some responsibility for this. We abandoned many of our Christian rituals and we allowed the secular world to hijack our holy days. We are the ones that took Christ out of Christmas. It’s for this reason that I write this blog on the first night of Hanukkah. Our Jewish cousins have not allowed their faith to be hijacked by a secular culture. Why? Because they continue to celebrate being dedicated to a dedicated God.

I don’t claim to be a Jewish Rabbi But, I can learn a few lessons from Jewish Rabbis. Here are a few lessons that the celebration of Hanukkah teaches.I paraphrased them from Chabad.org. They are relevant to people of faith … regardless of the faith.

• Don’t be ashamed to perform  God’s commands (mitzvahs), even if you feel different.
• Always increase in kindness and the practice of God’s law (Torah).
• A little light goes a long way.
• Take your faith to the streets.
• Be proud of your joyful religious-identity.
• Never be afraid to stand up for what’s right.

So, yes, it’s okay to say Merry Christmas. It’s also okay to say Happy Hanukkah! It’s even okay to say Happy Holidays. But, if you are a Christian and you want to keep Christ in your holy days, then my advise is to keep them holy.

Happy Holy Days!

My mom died on Christmas Day of 2006. We didn’t take any family pictures that day. Don’t make that mistake with your family this Christmas. You never know when this Christmas is the last Christmas.

Christmas, 2005

“Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid …” (Matt 1:20b, NRSV)

Like it, or not, fear is built into Advent and Christmas. How can one prepare for anything new without feeling some anxiety? Going on a first date, getting engaged, buying the first house, and giving birth to the first child … all of these have fear built into the experience.

Christmas offers many promises. The fulfillment of these promises comes with a cost. The cost is we have to work through our fears and embrace the unknown. Perhaps this is why we wrap gifts. We want to simulate the mystery. We’re trying to create a moment of surprise.

One of my aunts never opened her gifts with the family. She would collect the neatly decorated boxes and excuse herself from the living room and go to the den. In solitude, she opned her gifts with no one watching. The family understood and no one questioned her Christmas routine. She’s not the only person that doesn’t want to open their gifts in public. I suspect there’s a small amount of this discomfort in all of us. I think it’s this fear of the unknown that we feel. What if there’s a Bugs Bunny themed tie hidden in the darkness of the box? Or perhaps a fruit cake is wrapped and waiting? Will I be able to look at the unknown contents and act thankful? And – what if all of my efforts to purchase the perfect gift is less than perfect? Even if I see the perfect response from the recipient, how will I know that I’m not watching the perfect performance?

There was no way that Joseph could have predicted the gift he received at the first Christmas. Here’s what Joseph knew. He loved Mary. He wanted to marry her. Joseph even planned on Mary being the mother of his children. And Joseph was a man of faith, so also was clear about his intention to teach his children the faith of his father’s fathers. But … Joseph didn’t know that Mary was pregnant. Mary? Pregnant?!

This is where someone generally points out the shock of finding out that your finance is pregnant. I think most of us understand that Joseph had every right to be suspicious, confused, angry, and overwhelmed with human emotions. I find that it’s interesting that fear was the only emotion addressed by the “Angel of the Lord.” The uninvited messenger commanded, “do not be afraid.”

First of all, if God doesn’t want me to feel fear, then don’t send angels to my house. Some of you may feel uncomfortable with my honesty here, but my truth is that if I see an angel, I’m “gettin scared!” This will not be a religious experience for me. I’ll be convinced that I’m delusional and I’ll be extra careful not to mention the experience to my therapist. There’s a chance that the angel could convince me to believe. If the angel shared some really good news with me (like here’s the cash from your winning lottery ticket), then my fear could be transformed into joy. However, telling me that my fiancé is pregnant doesn’t fit into the “really good news” category. Now that I’m pondering the impact of hearing THIS news, I can’t find many other messages that could evoke as much fear. Wait! I can think of a message that could cause more anxiety.“Your fiancé is pregnant by the Spirit of God, and your baby will save the world.” I won’t even try to explain why I’m scared of the promise that a divine spirit impregnated my virgin girlfriend. I don’t have the words to articulate that level of fear. So, I’ll just mention the responsibility of having to parent the child that is the antidote for all of the world’s problems. I suppose I’m a decent parent, but I don’t think I have those parenting skills in me. That job is clearly above my pay-rate.

Notice that “Do not fear” was the angel’s second message to Joseph. The angel did not lead with the “do not fear” command. The first message was, “Joseph, you’re the son of David … remember who you are. Find comfort in your family history. Pause for a moment and know that God’s promise lives in you. Take a deep breath and inhale your story, your history, your values, your past and your future. Joseph, the son of David, God was with Abraham, Moses, David, and Elijah. The same God is with you.” The angel’s first message was to remember God’s faithfulness.

Here’s my Christmas wish for us. I pray that God’s faith in us will crowd out the extreme fears that paralyze the human spirit. I pray that we will have courage to move forward in the midst of normal and ordinary fears. Most important, I ask that God send us a messenger that reminds us that God is always with us and that we’re never alone.